Definition of SANITY

"Do something different."

I should find the Chinese symbols that mean this and get a tatoo. Anyone who knows me well is probably pretty sick of hearing this phrase out of me.

I could care less.

I will preach this and speak this as long as I have breath, because although a simple enough concept, it is remarkably difficult to do.

And it has changed my life.

Everyone knows Einstein's definition of insanity: doing the same thing over and over again, and expecting different results. And it's true; it's been proven over all eternity how insane we can be.

Now here's JEN's definition of SANITY: Do something different.

Makes sense, right? Yet how many of us actually really do it? We will sit around and quote Einstein all day long and tell everyone else how insane THEY are because we see them get the same job, date the same loser, do the same thing every weekend, etc. Yet they themselves continue doing the same things, but are the loudest at bitching and moaning when they aren't happy or things don't work out. I'm not judging: I am the KING of talkin' what I wasn't walkin'. And it wasn't until I realized that Einstein, with all due respect to his genius, should've added that last bit to his quote. It would have saved us all a great deal of time.

Part of the reason scientists do experiments is to establish the fact of and to document any consequences deriving from "different." They have a premise; they design an experiment; they conduct the experiment over and over and over again, carefully noting the procedure every time. If they do the same experiment 8,473,572,947 times the exact same way, they should get the same exact result 8,473,572,947 times. If they get a different result, they immediately start looking for the anomalies--what happened this time to change the outcome?

2 + 2 = 4. Without fail. It's not until you add 1 or subtract 2 that you get a different result.

I have had to learn, the HARD way, of course, to apply this in my life. In all areas. But most especially in love and relationships. And I discovered that my way just wasn't working. EVER.

For example, I have found that me + douchebag = FAIL. Every single time, without exception. So I started examining like a scientist what the anomaly was. Guess what, folks? It wasn't the douchebag of the moment's fault... it was MINE. Cuz I kept choosing douchebags to date! I love a good game of Duck, Duck, Douche as much as the next person, but only when I get to throw things at the douche. Playing that way in relationships really sucks. Yet I kept doing it! Over and over and over and over and over again...

So I changed it.

Helps to know what kind of results you want before you conduct an experiment. I know what kind of life I want, the kind of people I want in it, and the kind of relationship I'm looking for. I'm making decisions that will set me up to succeed at those goals. If something doesn't work, I change it.

Sounds logical. It IS radical. And it works.